It's Easier

I thought of all the drama of just being a girl. Seriously. I can vividly recall growing up in a California suburb in a group of five girls. Different days... no... let me correct that -- randomly it would be decided who was in and who was, well, left out. I SO vividly remember linking that experience to learning about excommunication in 7th grade. I remember thinking, "oooohhh, it's like that." Who would be leader? How was that decided? Probably something as easy to identify as inherent leadership abilities. Things a person is born to do.

When I became a mother I worried over the drama when I bore my second child. A second daughter. Oy vey! Two girls?! Here we go! Let the drama begin! I was raised the elder of only two children... the other being my brother. Brother. I could experience and/or witness "girly-drama" as a somewhat voluntary participant... not necessarily have to live with it in my face. On second thought, I guess I got a little "girly-drama" from having a mother... but that doesn't really compare does it? All the girls in the house say "uh uh."

My ramblings thus far lead me to my daily "deep thought" (more on that in a future blog). I've always played the peacekeeper in my house. I was raised that way from the beginning. I had a passionate, strong-willed, stubborn mother. She was from another culture to top it off where sometimes I wonder if all women from Guam aren't just this way... but I digress. Again.

As the peacekeeper, I would try to diffuse conflict of course, strive for "anticlimacticism", follow and obey all rules, be as "low maintenance" as I possibly could. Pair this with my Christian faith and I think I just always tried to explain a person's "shortcomings" (subject to public opinion). Most of the time I could simply say, "we have no idea what this person just walked away from, what upbringing or abuse this person could have suffered." Later this evolved to, "possible mental illness" or "disillusionment." This can grossly be categorized in the "different perspectives" category. Christianity alone dictates that we cannot judge anyone anyway, so that was always an alternative method as well.

In my life, whenever I caught a hint of "girly-drama" I would simply avoid it. I moved around enough in life to know what it felt like to be the object of ridicule. For that reason, I've come to wonder, why can't we all just take the easier way and just love? Truly, this is the easiest thing to do. If someone hurts me, I can just love in return.

It's noted in the Bible... "if someone slaps you, give them the other cheek" or something along those lines. Modernday societal values would call that low self esteem or being a "door mat." Would it be easier to seek conflict? Seek retribution? Would a person find true solace in revenge? Not likely.

What does giving love do for me? What does giving forgiveness do for me? It's a lighter load to carry. It's easier to overlook something or explain it away and move along. With more serious drama, then more love. Simple. Really. And to end with a cliche -- love really does conquer all.